The Way You Left Me
by nouore
Summary: Penelope Garcia is killed while at work.
1. Chapter 1

**The Way You Left Me**

**Disclaimer: **_I do not own Criminal Minds or its characters and situations. I am simply a vessel of imagination that uses said property._

Chapter One

It happened after a particularly hard case. They traveled to Richmond, Virginia. The unsub called himself 'The Twister', and it was as bad as it sounded. He randomly chose his victims and twisted their bodies with a homemade machine. Not all of his victims died, but they couldn't speak about what the unsub did to them; it was too much to handle.

The BAU team caught 'The Twister' after the fourth day they arrived. They found hidden clues in the letters he sent to the police. The unsub was shot down when he pulled out a gun and fired on the team when they reached his house.

On the way to the airport, the team called Quantico.

The last thing the team heard Technical Analyst Penelope Garcia say was: Be safe my loves. May your journey be filled with happy thoughts and pretty pictures.


	2. Chapter 2

**The Way You Left Me**

**Disclaimer: **_I do not own Criminal Minds or its characters and situations. I am simply a vessel of imagination that uses said property._

Chapter Two

It took two unnaturally long hours for the team to arrive at Quantico. They had to drive back because the jet needed repairs. When they arrive at headquarters, it was the picture of pandemonium. The entrance to their office area was filled with people from every department and local law enforcements.

They walked towards the crowd, but Director Erin Strauss came out of nowhere and escorted the team to the front doors.

"Agent Hotchner, I think you and your team should stay in the lobby, or maybe go upstairs to one of the conference rooms," Strauss suggested. Her voice was breaking and tears were in her eyes.

"What happened?" Hotch asked. The rest of the team stood behind him. Other agents whispered among themselves and gave the team sorrowful glances. All of a sudden, the crowd began moving out of the way for someone.

They were coroners and they were wheeling out a body bag.

Morgan stepped to the side and pulled out his cell phone.

"What are you doing," Rossi asked, walking over to Morgan. He did not like the feeling of being in the lobby. Something was wrong.

"I'm calling Garcia. I don't see her," Morgan answered. The rest of the team wondered where their tech was also. If the murder happened around their offices, she must be shaken up by now. They gathered around Morgan and turned their backs to the coroners' procession.

"Hotch?" Morgan asked in a quiet voice. Garcia wasn't answering her phone, and she always picked up for him. Morgan worried; his heart hurt and his throat throbbed. He wanted to believe Garcia was just a witness.

Agent Hotchner did not answer. He was struck mute by what he saw next.

_Nothing's going to change my world  
>Nothing's going to change my world<em>

They all heard Garcia's ringtone going off behind them. When they turned around, they saw her bloody cell phone light up through an evidence bag.


	3. Chapter 3

**The Way You Left Me**

**Disclaimer: **_I do not own Criminal Minds or its characters and situations. I am simply a vessel of imagination that uses said property._

Chapter Three

The team was silent. The lobby cleared out and after about ten minutes, Hotch and his team were the only ones left. Director Strauss said nothing to them as she went with the crime scene investigators to assess the damage.

Reid opened his mouth to speak but he didn't know what to say. He wanted to hear Garcia's voice yelling at someone about how she was fine and wanted to go home. Reid wanted to go home.

JJ looked down at the floor as she began to hyperventilate. Her knees wobbled and her stomach churned. She needed to leave. She needed to process. She needed to know that Garcia died quickly, that she did not suffer. JJ needed to suffer alone.

Prentiss bit her thumbnail. Her other hand shook. She could taste the clear fingernail polish Garcia put on her nails in an attempt to stop her from biting them. Her mind made her think she could hear Garcia walking towards them, her heels clicking on the floor. Prentiss could hear her own heart breaking.

Rossi tried not to think. But he thought about the situation. He thought about the weight of everything. He thought about the strength he and the team needed to get through this. He thought about Garcia's last moments. All he could do now was think about everything.

Seaver cried silently. She cried for her team. She cried for Garcia. She cried for herself.

Hotch hoped for the best. He hoped they could catch whoever did this. He hoped his team could get through this. He hoped he could make it.

Morgan had his eyes closed. Whenever he inhaled, he could smell the stench of a crime scene. He fought for the strength to hold it all in. He fought for the strength to not break down. He fought for the focus he would need to find her killer. He fought for the memory of his "Baby Girl".

When Strauss returned to tell the team they could collect their belongings from their offices, they were gone.


	4. Chapter 4

**The Way You Left Me**

**Disclaimer: **_I do not own Criminal Minds or its characters and situations. I am simply a vessel of imagination that uses said property._

A/N: I am going to start making longer chapters, starting with this one.

Thanks for the reviews. And if you have any suggestions, let's hear them.

Chapter Four

Reid left the lobby first. He didn't want to say the wrong thing. There was really nothing to say.

_Garcia is dead._

As he walked through the parking lot, he could see news crews lining up outside of the Quantico gates. He never liked the media because they didn't seem to think about the victims.

_Garcia was a victim._

Reid shook his head and unlocked his car door. When he got into his car, his vision blurred and tears began to fall. But he wasn't going to let himself fully cry so close to the crime scene.

As he drove through the back entrance, his placed his thoughts on his car. This was his bluish-green, four door, automatic car. It wasn't expensive or too cheap. It was perfect for him.

_I would have been driving home in a ridiculously expensive car if Garcia was not there to help._

She haggled with the car salesman for almost an hour. Reid only had to sign his name on some forms. He trusted her judgment on things like that.

He was home in record time. Reid didn't say anything to his doorman, not even a smile. Uncharacteristically, he took the elevator to his third floor apartment with the intention to get inside as quick as possible. But he froze when he reached his front door.

Finally, after turning the key in the lock, Reid pushed the door open and walked into his new apartment. He just moved here after his old apartment building caught on fire. He was hardly able to save his firebox filled with important documents and his favorite book, Where the Sidewalk Ends by Shel Silverstein.

He took a shower and put on his new favorite pajamas; they had books on the pants and a reading penguin on the shirt. He cleaned up the place a little bit and made a cup of mint tea. He glanced over at a large, bright orange box by the kitchen. He remembered Garcia told him she put it in his apartment while he was away working on the case; it was her housewarming gift.

_She was like a mother to me._

Reid remembered when he was on crutches and had to stay at Quantico with Garcia while the rest of the team travelled. The experience was both troublesome and fun. It was Garcia that came by his apartment and made sure he could get around okay. She scolded him about having to navigate around so many books while on crutches. Reid secretly believed his old apartment burned so fast because it was seventy percent books. When he was able to walk again, she gave him a crocheted doll that looked like him; it had all of the injuries he received since he joined the team.

_She told me that Little Spencer couldn't handle anything else, so I should be more careful._

He wanted Little Spencer now. Frantically, he searched his apartment for the doll. After thirty minutes, the end result was no doll and a messy apartment. Reid sat on his couch and tried to think about where he put it.

_It was supposed to be in a basket under the bed._

He searched the under the bed again and even in the closet and in the pantry. Still there was no doll. And then it occurred to him what happened.

_That's right. It burned in the fire._

Defeated, he sat on the couch again and sobbed. The emotion of the day hit him hard and his eyes filled with tears. While he was wiping his eyes, he glanced over at Garcia's gift. With a sigh, he walked over to the bright box and carefully removed the paper.

Inside was a note in Garcia's handwriting:

**Here is another Little Spencer. I burned his shoes a little to represent the fire. There is also a blanket for you to keep for when you need a hug. –With many loves, P.G.**

He took out the doll. It looked just like the other one, except with slightly burned tennis shoes. He smiled for the first time that day, but it didn't stay on his face for long.

The blanket was thick and hand knitted. It was both brightly colored and dark. When he held it up, it was longer than him and could go around his body twice.

New tears ran down his face as he walked over to the couch with the blanket around him and Little Spencer in his arms. It felt like a hug and smelled like Garcia.

Spencer Reid curled up on the couch and cried himself to sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

**The Way You Left Me**

**Disclaimer: **_I do not own Criminal Minds or its characters and situations. I am simply a vessel of imagination that uses said property._

Chapter Five

JJ saw Spencer leave. He went out of the front door but she decided to use the side entrance; her car was parked by the other end of the building anyway. JJ knew she would have to walk past offices filled with people who knew more than she did at the moment. That she did not know any of the details bothered her for a few seconds, but then she realized she didn't want to know anything right now.

On the way through the building, she noticed the other agents did not make eye contact with her. Not able to handle the too silent atmosphere, she took a short cut Garcia told her about. JJ didn't notice her surroundings until she heard some people talking around the corner.

"I heard there was blood all over the monitors," a male voice said.

"I heard that too," a female voice replied. "I also heard that she was alive through most of it."

JJ charged around the corner with a stern look. She found herself looking at two techs that she sometimes saw around the building. They had the same type of discombobulated wardrobe as Garcia. All of a sudden, she was too hurt to say anything and she speed walked her way out of the building. She forgot that Garcia's shortcut was through the Tech Cave.

Once she reached the parking lot, JJ slowed down enough to catch her breath and look for her SUV. On shaky legs, she slowly walked to her vehicle which was parked under a tree. She collected herself before driving off.

JJ did not want to go home just yet. She missed her son Henry and her husband Will as she always did when she returned from a case, but the emotions stampeding around her heart and mind would not allow her to face them. Yet she knew Will needed to know what happened. He would have to be the one to tell Henry because JJ couldn't.

JJ pulled over on the side of the highway and cut the engine off. She took out her cell phone and dialed her husband's phone number.

"Hey ma chère," Will greeted. He heard through the law enforcement grapevine that something happened at Quantico.

"Hey," JJ greeted in return. Her voice was small and shaky.

"Oh, chère, did you know the person that was killed at Quantico today?" He was aware that her position required her to be familiar with many people.

"You knew her too," JJ answered. She felt sick again and debated getting out of the car for some fresh air.

"Really?" Will exclaimed. He thought about it for a moment and realized the only women he knew were on JJ's team or in her department. Her team was in Richmond with JJ so it had to be someone in her department.

"Will…" JJ took a breath. "Will… it was Garcia," She cried quietly into the phone. Will didn't say anything. He forgot Garcia usually stayed behind.

"We just got back, Will, and they were wheeling out her body." JJ told him. At that moment, she began wailing as tears flowed down her face.

"Chère?... JJ?" Will called out to her. "Jennifer, where are you?"

"I… I… I pulled over," JJ answered through her sobbing.

"I am coming to you," Will said as he got up from his desk.

"No!" JJ yelled. She wanted to be alone for a while. "I need you to take care of Henry. You have to tell him." Making it Will's responsibility was not fair, but it was all she could think to do.

"… Alright, J. I'll tell him. But he is going to want his momma before the night is out," Will informed his wife. He would let her have her time, and he would tell Henry the bad news. But he was not going to let her hide away from all of this. She had shut down before and he barely stayed around.

"Will... thank you," JJ said. He really was stronger than JJ when it became too much for her to handle.

"I love you, chère. I am here for you through anything. You don't have to do this alone," Will quietly told his hurting wife.

"I love you, too," JJ replied before she hung up the phone. She placed the phone in the passenger seat and took a deep breath. Will knew exactly what to say to make her not get a hotel room somewhere and hide.

Part of her wanted to throw her wedding ring, cell phone, and any form of identification out of the window. She would disappear completely like she wanted to do so many times before. The only person in the world aware of what really went on inside of JJ's mind was Penelope Garcia; they were best friends for a reason.

"Penelope Garcia is dead," JJ said out loud. With a tearful scoff, she started the vehicle up and drove away to nowhere.

Will went to his boss and told him that he needed the next week or so off from work.

"LaMontagne, did your wife know that person at Quantico?" Michael Garrett, his boss, asked him.

"Yeah… we both did," Will replied. "She was my son's godmother."

Garrett watched as Will blinked fast to not let his tears fall.

"Okay, Will, take all the time you need," Garrett told him. He recalled a picture on Will's desk of his son and a blonde woman wearing bright colors. He knew that if Will was hurting this much, then Jennifer was hurting much more. If this was like the last time, then William LaMontagne, Jr. was on his own in this until his wife calmed down.

Fifty miles away, JJ sat in a diner. Her hair was disheveled and her makeup needed touching up. A waitress came by with a plate of pancakes and bacon and a glass of orange juice. JJ looked up with confusion.

"It's on the house, dear," the waitress said. Her nametag said Harriet. She had buttons attached to her uniform and her hair had pink streaks.

"Thank you," JJ said with a smile.

"I find that when something bad happens, breakfast always seems to help," Harriet replied. She had seen many people come to the diner over her twenty years of working there. She made it her mission to give them all a free meal so that way they were not hungry on top of being upset.

"Thank you so much," JJ said. She didn't realize how hungry she was. As she ate, she thought about her family and how she needed to get back to them because they just lost a family member. She thought about her team and how they were all feeling the loss of a good friend. JJ wanted to suffer alone, like she always did, but this time it didn't help.

JJ finished eating and left a twenty dollar bill on the table. She smiled at Harriet and left the diner. She had a family to go home to.


	6. Chapter 6

**The Way You Left Me**

**Disclaimer: **_I do not own Criminal Minds or its characters and situations. I am simply a vessel of imagination that uses said property._

**A/N:** Everyone thank you so much for your reviews. I know this story is sad. Thanks for reading the sadness.

Chapter Six

Emily Prentiss wanted to make a stop somewhere before she went home.

She pulled into the shopping center's parking lot and scanned her surroundings. It was a habit that she could not break after so many years of looking for the bad guy and noticing the most subtle of clues. Before stepping out of her car, she grabbed a piece of paper from the glove department.

Prentiss was not a shy person; a bit of a nerd, yes, but not shy. Yet here she was speaking softly and balancing her weight from foot to foot. She showed the piece of paper to the receptionist who just smiled at her and told her to take any free seat.

"So what can I do for you?" asked the woman on the other side of table that stood between her and Emily.

"I friend of mine said this was the easiest way to stop biting my nails," Emily told her. She held out her hands and the woman gave a slight gasp.

"Your friend was right," she said with a smile. "Acrylic nails are one of the best ways to cure nail biting in adults."

"She gave me a gift certificate for this place a few months ago… when my nails grew back." Emily said the last part very quietly.

While the woman worked wonders, Emily thought about her friend. Penelope Garcia's voice carried Prentiss through the darkest time of her life. A simple voice message from a friend made her hold on to what was good in the world.

It was the one of the hardest moments of her life. Emily was on the hunt for Ian Doyle, a dangerous man from her past. She was waiting in her vehicle, alone. Her phone beeped and she saw a voicemail notification. Against her better judgment, Emily listened to the voicemail and was confronted with Penelope Garcia's voice.

"_Hey it's me, Hotch asked me to try all your numbers but this is an old listing and you probably don't even use it anymore, but if it is you and you out there come home, please. God Emily, what did you think? That we would just let you walk out of our lives? I am so furious at you right now! But then I think about how scared you must be in some dark place all alone, but you're not alone, okay? You are not alone. We are in that dark place with you! We are waving flashlights and calling your name. So if you can see us, come home. But if you can't then, then you stay alive because we're coming."_

It was that beacon of hope that made Emily hold on through the torture. When Derek Morgan found her, Ian Doyle had a wooden stake in his chest and Emily was barely conscious. She fainted in Morgan's arms and woke up in the hospital a week later. The first face she saw was Garcia's.

Now, Emily sat in a nail salon. The woman was almost done painting the new acrylic nails on Emily's hands.

When everything was finished, Emily gave the woman forty dollars and handed the gift certificate to the receptionist. She was careful to not chip her nails as she got into her car. Emily was glad she did this because by the end of the week, her hands would have been a bloody, gnarled mess.

She stared at her hands for a while before heading home. It was a simple French manicure on not-too-short nails. She could hear Garcia's voice telling her that she needed more color, or that she should have gone with longer nails. Emily sniffled as she turned her car on and headed home.


	7. Chapter 7

**The Way You Left Me**

**Disclaimer: **_I do not own Criminal Minds or its characters and situations. I am simply a vessel of imagination that uses said property._

**A/N:** This was a hard chapter to write. Seaver is still a new character and Rossi is hard to capture. Review to your heart's desire.

Chapter Seven

David Rossi followed Ashley Seaver to the locker rooms. He waited outside for her as she changed into a tee shirt, sweatpants, and a pair of tennis shoes. They were at the FBI cadet training course. Ashley almost broke down in the lobby and David took her outside to his car. It was his idea to bring her to the course. She needed to work off some energy. When she came out of the locker room, her eyes were red and her face was flushed.

"You ready kid?" David asked. He felt responsible for her. Garcia's death hurt him down to the core, but he knew it did more damage to Seaver. No one but him knew about the times when Garcia stayed with Ashley and talked to her; she played big sister to the new team member after hours. Seaver did not want anyone to know because she wanted to keep the façade of being strong.

"Thanks for this," Ashley said to David. He stood on the sidelines while Ashley warmed up and began the course. She climbed the walls and crawled under gates and ran over hills and trudged through the mud. This was her world. She could think here.

Seaver didn't know Garcia for long, but she was her family. The confirmation of this was one night when Ashley stayed late with the intention to finish paper work. Halfway through the last folder, Ashley started to cry. She felt like she was alone and inadequate. The team was so close to each other. When Prentiss went off to find Doyle, Ashley felt out of place. Regardless of what everyone told her, she did not feel like she was much help.

Garcia was supposed to be in her office, with the door closed, setting up new equipment. So Ashley was surprised when she looked up and Garcia was standing there with a cup of tea.

"I thought you could use this," Garcia said, holding out the cup. "It's lavender, mint, and chamomile. I added a bit of sugar to it also."

"Thanks, Garcia," Ashley said. The tea was exactly what she needed. As she drank it down, Garcia took a seat and watched her until she finished.

"Are you going to be okay?" Garcia asked. She noticed Seaver had troubled adjusting ever since Prentiss returned from the hospital. The rest of the team included her, but she still seemed slightly standoffish.

"I am going to be fine," Ashley said. "It's just I'm not used to being a part of something." She began crying again.

"Aww, honey," Garcia got up to give her a hug. The young profiler cried and cried while Garcia held her close.

Garcia listened as Ashley explained how it was hard growing up with her dad. The amount of work she had to put into everything she did so people wouldn't try to determine how damaged she was. She wanted to be good at her job but no more than she wanted people to see her and not her past.

After that night, the two met up once a week to talk about what ever Ashley had on her mind. Garcia informed Rossi about anything she felt he needed to know, just so Ashley had someone else on the team to talk to when they were away on a case.

So now, after Garcia's death, David Rossi watched over Ashley. It kept him busy and away from his thoughts. He always had trouble dealing with his strongest feelings.

All of a sudden, Ashley fell over. David started to walk towards her but she held her hand up and shook her head. She needed this. She needed to cry out loud. Her hands gripped her sides and she screamed and cried. Rossi went to go sit by her. He rubbed her back and cried with her, not loudly but his shoulders shook.

To an outsider, they were the picture of a father and daughter crying over the death of the mother.


	8. Chapter 8

**The Way You Left Me**

**Disclaimer: **_I do not own Criminal Minds or its characters and situations. I am simply a vessel of imagination that uses said property._

Chapter Eight

Aaron Hotchner sat at his wife's grave. He had been crying for at least an hour and had no intentions of stopping any time soon. He lost another wife today.

Penelope Garcia and he did not have a secret romance, but they had a connection. She made him smile when he needed it. She was the light in his world, that same feminine brightness that he loved about his wife. Garcia helped fill his life with happiness and positivity when he thought there was no more left in the world. There were times when he visited her office just to see the color she surrounds herself with.

Now the only color he could see was grey. The color of Haley's tombstone. His devoted wife. She asked for the divorce but she still loved him with all her heart. He always thought that if she really wanted to end things, she would have seen other people when the divorce was final. She didn't keep him from their son Jack either. Hotch knew she would never separate them, no matter how frustrated she was with her mostly absent husband.

The guilt over her death was still there. Some days it was all he could think about, and some days it was far from his thoughts. When it was the only thing on his mind, he drank. His father drank too, so Hotch made sure to not take to the bottle when Jack was around. Never had he been mad enough to hit his son, but it was one of his greatest fears. It was on Haley's list of fears also, especially when he came home from a hard case.

He hit her once. Hotch had returned from a case in Montana where a child murderer used his job as a bus driver to do his dirty work. The entire team was affected by the outcome; the guy set fire to school bus full of children as he stood by and watched. The unsub shot himself in the head when the fire department showed up. The children's screams echoed in Hotch's mind for weeks. He just wanted the sound to stop, so he drank himself into ground at night. When Haley tried to get him to stop and seek professional help a week later, he slapped her. He couldn't see straight but he saw the redness in her face darken.

She could have left him that night, but she stayed with him against her better judgment. When she finally got the divorce, she didn't mention the incident. It was their private secret.

He cheated on her once too. It was with Kate Joyner from the New York office. Haley had no idea about the other woman because Hotch hid it well. His team picked up on it when they were working on the case that would end Joyner's life. As far as he knew, none of them consulted with Haley about their suspicions.

Aaron Hotchner was far from perfect. He tried to be as focused as possible when times got rough; sometimes he needed more than focus. Every bad case, every bad day just weighed down his spirits. And Garcia was usually the one to help him out of his darkness. She always had a smile for him or words of encouragement. There would be no Garcia to help now. In a few days, he would be in the graveyard again. Jack would hold his hand as they walked around the tombstones. Hotch would cry silently and listen to the emotion of his team members. He would probably start drinking again.

Hotch hoped for the strength to get up from in front of his wife's grave. He gave up when another wave of sadness enveloped him. He had too many inner demons fighting for attention on this sad day.

At this point, most of his tears were for Haley and his childhood and his son and his bad decisions. But some… some were for Garcia and the color that was draining from his world.

**A/N: **I didn't know what to write for Hotch's chapter, but then I let this week's episode to guide my thoughts. I think Hotch's theme for this chapter is "All I Need" by Mat Kearney. It came on while I wrote this and it seemed to fit.


	9. Chapter 9

**The Way You Left Me**

**Disclaimer: **_I do not own Criminal Minds or its characters and situations. I am simply a vessel of imagination that uses said property._

Chapter Nine

It was late. Derek Morgan waited quietly while he sat in the lobby of the coroner's office. He didn't cry or pace. For once in his life, Morgan waited quietly with his hands folded in his lap; he was there to identify Penelope Garcia's body.

The past eighteen months were the best of his life. He and Garcia made it official hours after he returned from a case in Alabama, when Derek knocked on Garcia's door at three in the morning with tears running down his face. He saw the face of his angel and it only made him cry harder.

"_Oh, sweetie, come in." Garcia stepped to the side to let Derek into her apartment and closed the door behind him. He had been there before on countless occasions, but this time was different. The man that stood before her was not the usual charming black Adonis knight but a man at a crossroad in his life._

"_Garcia… Penelope… I… I don't know how to say this." He sat down on her couch and covered his face with his hands. She stayed by the door with her hands crossed over her chest. It terrified and confused her to see him like this._

"_Derek, what is it?"Ever since the team returned, Derek had been acting funny. The case was a sad one. While being interrogated, the unsub had mistaken Prentiss for his lost love and it broke everyone's heart when she told him she wasn't who he thought she was. He only said sorry and told her she could go home, just like he told the women he kidnapped. It turned out that the woman he was looking for moved away when they were young adults and he had been searching for her ever since. His recent brain injury sparked his need to kidnap anyone that looked like the woman in his memories. He kept them for five days and let them go only if they promised not to tell anyone what happened._

"_I don't want to spend my life searching for you." Derek looked Penelope in the eyes and tried to smile. _

"_What are you talking about?" Garcia went to sit next him on the couch. He took her hands into his and gave them a slight squeeze. _

"_Penelope Garcia, I love you… It took a desperate man in Alabama to convince me that I have something right in front of me that I do not want to lose… I don't want to be sixty years old, wandering the streets looking for my beloved."_

"_So I am your beloved?" Penelope asked with a smirk on her face. _

_Derek kissed her at that point. From then one, they were inseparable; yet, it never showed in their work. The flirting continued but it was different. Whenever Derek left for a case, he made it a habit to kiss Garcia goodbye._

"Derek Morgan?" the coroner's assistant called from the hallway. Derek rose from his seat and walked with determined steps. As he followed the small woman, he saw the large viewing windows that separated people from their newly deceased loved ones. The woman stopped in front of the last window on the left. She pressed a button on the wall and the off white curtains parted. Derek stepped back from the sight.

Penelope Garcia looked as if she was sleeping. There was a slight smile on her face and her hair was in bright blonde curls. Derek saw that face every morning when he woke up before she did. But this time, he knew she would not wake up and wink at him.

"Sir… is this your fiancée?" the coroner's assistant asked him. Derek silently nodded. She had seen many men break down at the sight of their dead love, but this man seemed to take it all in stride. _He must have seen some troubling things in his life._ She held out a clipboard for him to sign to officially verify the identification of the deceased.

Derek was down the hall before the curtains closed. He couldn't think straight and a boiling rage churned in his body. Home was not an option because Penelope was everywhere. And it would be cruel and unusual punishment for him to the office. He drove aimlessly until he saw a bright sign advertising Smash Town.

He had heard about the place from Reid. Anyone over the age of twenty one could go in, grab a pair of goggles and gloves, and smash anything in the room. Derek needed something to destroy before he destroyed himself.

The parking lot was fairly empty. Walking to the entrance, Derek was surprised to not hear the sounds of pure mayhem coming from the building. At the front counter, the cashier asked for identification to hold while he was in the room. He gave him his driver's license and paid the fifty dollar entrance fee. As he processed Derek's information, he gave him a speech about having proper footwear and clothing, which could be bought at the adjacent store, and administered a breathalyzer test. Derek had to sign a few waivers before the cashier called over another worker who led Derek to his room.

The older man explained how Smash Town was the easiest way for someone to let go. The rooms were sound proof so customers could yell as much as they wanted. He went on to say that the rooms were monitored to make sure no one hurt themselves too much. Once they reached the room, the older man unlocked the door and handed Derek a sledge hammer and a pair of green goggles.

"If you don't mind me asking," the older man said, "what brings you here so late at night?"

"My fiancée was killed today," Derek answered. The older man just nodded and unlocked the door.

Inside the room was a wooden bed frame, various pieces of art, dishes, windows, and all types of breakable things. Derek stood in the middle of the room for a while before he started. He took deep breaths and let hot tears fall from his eyes.

He gathered his strength and held up the sledgehammer. First he swung at one of the windows first, then at a vase. He kept going around the room breaking and bashing everything into tiny pieces. Derek broke down once he started to tear the walls down.

"It's not fair!" His voice echoed around the room. He kept smashing the wall with the sledgehammer and yelling. He cursed his job for not looking after his love. He cursed himself for not being strong enough to keep Penelope safe. He yelled and let out all of his feelings.

"I fucking loved her!" He kicked around the broken shards of glass and wood on the floor. His thoughts flew from his mouth as he yelled at everyone about what about them that made him so mad. At that moment, he hated everyone from his mother to his boss to himself to his love. With loud cries of anguish, he let his body and mind work together to destroy everything in sight.

After a while, there was nothing else to crush, and he was exhausted. Derek Morgan was scared to go home. He was frightened to go work even if he would have to face his fears to find her killer. He left the room in tears. After returning the hammer and goggles to the front desk, he grabbed his license and went to his car.

"Morgan?" a familiar voice called out to him. Derek froze.

"Hey, Hotch," Derek answered as he turned around. Aaron Hotchner stood there in the Smash Town parking lot wearing a sweatshirt, jeans, and construction boots. Derek could smell alcohol coming from Hotch's body and he wondered how he was planning to pass the breathalyzer test. The two didn't say anything for a few seconds; then Aaron moved closer and Derek fell into his arms.

The two men cried into each other's shoulders, and it didn't matter that they were in public. They needed each other at that moment as the realization of the loss they suffered became too much.

On the other side of town, Rossi held Ashley Seaver close to him while she faded away to sleep. They were in his home because he wanted to keep an eye on her. The original plan was to have her sleep in one of the guest rooms but she didn't want to sleep alone. So as the two drifted off to sleep in his bed, Rossi thought about the days to come and prayed that it wouldn't be as hard as his imagination was making it out to be.

Minutes from Rossi's place, Prentiss was trying to bit her fake nails. Her teeth began to hurt from all the effort so she started on the skin around the freshly manicured nails. She didn't want to sleep until her body shut down on its own. Emily was a trained in surviving torture, so her body wouldn't want sleep for a while.

A few miles away, JJ held a sleeping Henry in her arms. The young boy cried himself to sleep after she came home to verify the news of his godmother's death. JJ leaned on Will's shoulder as they both cried over their broken family.

Not too far from there, Spencer Reid was awake and a little disoriented. He sat on the bathroom floor next to his hidden stash of dilaudid. He held a needle in his hand and fought hard to not inject the drug into his vein.

**A/N:** Sorry for the delay. The inspiration songs for this chapter are "Sideways" by Citizen Cope, "Golden Train" by Justin Nozuka, and "Skipping Stone" by Amos Lee. I want to stop the story after the funeral, but part of me wants to keep going. If anyone has any requests or suggestions, let me know.


	10. Chapter 10

**The Way You Left Me**

_Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds or its characters and situations. I am simply a vessel of imagination that uses said property._

**Chapter Ten**

Two days after Penelope Garcia's death, Derek Morgan finally left the apartment they lived in together for a year. He received a call from Hotch who reminded him that they had to have a funeral for Garcia. The rest of the team decided to meet at the park, one of Garcia's favorite places, and plan everything. Hotch had asked Derek to bring any paperwork he thought might help in the process. Derek was not given the option to have someone come by and pick up the documents. He needed to get out of the house.

Derek started packing up Penelope's belongings after Hotch left the day before. The two of them were nursing serious hangovers, Aaron from heavy drinking and Derek from heartbreak, and decided to hang around the house. Aaron stayed to make sure Derek was not a harm to himself and left once he realized that Derek was going to need some alone time.

Driving to the park was difficult but necessary. Derek wore a simple black t-shirt, jeans, and tennis shoes. He was not surprised to see the rest of the team wearing the same type of outfit. As he got out of the car, he made sure to take Garcia's important documents with him; he had to turn back twice because he forgot them. When he reached the group, he sat down at a picnic table under a tree; Derek gave a weak smile and said nothing.

After a few minutes of silence, Derek unbound the documents and spread them out on the table. He was not surprised when he found the documents in an easy to find place next to the computer. Garcia arranged everything, like he assumed everyone else did, after the case in Tennessee. They all nearly died when the unsub's wife attached a bomb to their plane on the day they were headed back to the airport. The team survived because they decided to stop at a diner before boarding the plane. On the way home, everyone thought about what their loved ones would do if they suddenly died in the field. The insurance they all had covered a small portion of funeral costs and posthumous debts, but because they willingly put their lives in harm's way, they had to find other ways to ensure financial security for their loved ones. Derek had a folder full of instructions for after his untimely demise; he would have to change it now.

It was JJ's idea to meet up and separate the tasks for Garcia's funeral, instead of having Morgan do everything. Reid shuffled the documents and handed them out to everyone face down. He made sure that Morgan had the honor of acquiring her coffin. After Hotch made sure every aspect of the funeral was assigned, he suggested they all start to get to work. He treated the planning of Garcia's funeral like a case; he had to. While no one had plans of returning to work any time soon, he felt the need to turn this horrible event into something they could control.

The team chose a date, and after a round of hugs, they all left to do their assigned tasks.

The team could not have had a better funeral for Penelope Garcia.

Her dress was bright yellow with multicolored flowers along the top. Her shoes were a bright blue strappy number and her nails were painted bright red. She wore her favorite pair of purple glasses and matching jewelry. Her makeup was flawless with its natural tones and red lipstick. Her hair was its natural blonde and in curls. Her engagement ring stood out like a star on a clear night.

Emily Prentiss was in charge of Garcia's look. She wanted to make sure Garcia looked like Garcia even in death. She gave the makeup artist specific instructions along with a stack of photos. In Emily's mind, when people walked by her coffin, she wanted people to see the real Penelope Garcia and not someone's imitation.

Her coffin was bright red with silver trim on the outside and hot pink on the inside. The exterior was the most durable and the inside was the softest.

Derek Morgan was in charge of Garcia's body. He wanted the best for his love and was willing to pay top dollar to make sure Penelope was buried the way she deserved to be. Her outside insurance covered all of the funeral costs but that did not matter to Morgan. If he was to go bankrupt over her funeral, then that is what would happen. He made sure that his fiancée's body would remain as perfect and as safe and as comfortable as possible while resting six feet underground.

Everyone who knew Penelope Garcia enough to know why they were not allowed to wear black attended the funeral. Her four stepbrothers were there with their wives and children. Past employers were there with past co-workers and various acquaintances. Many FBI agents came. The BAU headquarters was a ghost town on that unusually warm afternoon. By the time the priest began, there was standing room only in the church.

Jennifer Jareau-LaMontagne was in charge of telling the world about the death of Penelope Garcia. She used the address book on Penelope's personal computer, which she asked the tech department to hack. The hardest part was rallying the media and setting the facts straight about the circumstances of her death. She used almost all of her favors to have Garcia's death erased from the televisions and websites and newspapers as a brutal murder in the FBI's backyard; she did not want her friend's death overshadowed by a statement on lax security. The second hardest part was making all of those phone calls. JJ needed to have an estimate of who would come to the funeral and it fluctuated. Garcia worked all over the nation and knew people all over the world. Some people did not know if they could get off work while others sounded too heartbroken to even think about coming. A couple of people thought JJ was playing a joke on them and simply hung up on her. Garcia's stepbrothers were not close to their little sister but they said they would drop everything to attend her funeral. When JJ called one of Garcia's associates from when she worked under the radar, she was not only surprised that they already knew but also amazed at their insistence to contact the rest of the underground group. After two days of calling, JJ was exhausted buy getting closer to accepting the situation. Penelope touched so many lives and in such a good way that the world stopped for them when they had to bury her.

The service itself was touching and beautiful and terribly sad. Garcia's team sat in the front row with their families. Behind them sat Garcia's four stepbrothers. The rest of the church was filled with the many people who came to pay their respect to Penelope Garcia.

Spencer Reid was in charge of the moment when the world would last see Penelope Garcia in person. The priest kept his words safely between religious and secular. There was no music, just the sound of the wind through the windows, the priest's voice, and various people crying. Spencer took into account the different views of all of the people Garcia knew in her life and planned accordingly. He made sure the priest said the obligatory text and also what Spencer provided. There were no obscure texts or too difficult of a vocabulary, only brightly colored words that encapsulated the spirit of Penelope Garcia.

The gravesite was under a beautiful, young, healthy oak tree. The sunrise and sunset was visible from that spot, and on a clear night, the stars sparkled. The ground itself was sturdy and soft and green with grass. Wildflowers grew along the base of the tree and around where Penelope's body would be.

David Rossi was in charge of Penelope Garcia's final resting place. He talked to the cemetery landscaper about adding flower seeds to the dirt Penelope was to be covered with so that later on flowers would grow. He wanted Penelope to be surrounded by beautiful things; it was how she lived her life.

Five days after her death, Technical Analyst Penelope Garcia was lowered into the ground.

Her headstone read:

**Penelope Jean Garcia**

**1976-2011**

**Empress of Color **

**Queen of Our Hearts**

**Goddess of the Technical World**

**May your journey be filled with happy thoughts and pretty pictures**

Aaron Hotchner was in charge of Penelope Garcia's immortal words. He wanted all those that walked by her grave to know that she was loved and appreciated. She deserved it.

The reception hall was filled with color. Most of the guests were instructed to not wear dark colors. The hall looked like the inside of a ninety-six color crayon box. In the main area was a wonderful spread of food beverages. The guests mingled and chatted and shared.

Ashley Seaver was in charge of Penelope Garcia's legacy. It meant a lot to her that she embody the spirit of Garcia as she took care of the many guests. Ashley talked with Garcia's stepbrothers and listened to stories from her underground friends. The guests were given mini photo albums filled with photos of Garcia and an extensive biography. The back of the album had extra space for the guests to add their own memories. It was her job to keep the spirit of Garcia alive once the reception hall cleared out and they were all left with one less friend in the world.

When the last guest departed, the entire team piled into Hotch's SUV and drove to Garcia's gravesite. The fresh dirt on top of her coffin stood out against the bright green grass. They all held hands as they each said a silent goodbye to their coworker and friend.

_PG, it's Emily. I miss the hell out of you right now. Did you see my nails? I might make it a habit. Enjoy heaven because you deserve it._

_Kitten, I don't know if you can hear me. It's Dave. You watch over everyone, okay? They need it. And if you have time, keep an eye out for me too, would you? Farewell, kitten._

_Penelope? It's Ashley. I want you to know that I will be as strong as you said I was. But give me a couple of days, okay?_

_PG, Henry and Will miss you. I miss you… so much. You stood by me during my darkest days and I don't know if I am able to make it without you. I will try just don't hold it against me if I slip._

_Penelope Garcia, you were amazing in so many ways. Whoever receives you as their guardian angel will be one of the luckiest people in the world. Say hello to Haley for me. And yes, after it is all said and done, I will smile._

_I have to believe that you can hear me now. I have to believe that there is a heaven. I have to believe that you will continue to watch over me. If I don't believe, then it is like I don't believe in the good you brought into the world and into my life._

_Baby Girl, you know I miss you. We had something so great. I know you won't want me to sulk but I can't help it. I love you, and this is not goodbye. I will talk to you again._

**A/N: Feel free to give me any suggestions or ask any questions.**

**Thank you for reading. Thank you for your reviews. Thank you to all of you that added this to your favorites and alerts, and I hope this is meeting your expectations.**

**I wanted this chapter finished sooner but I just got a new kitten. I named her Dusty because she collects dust as she likes to hide under the couch and behind the reading chair.**

**The next chapter is Garcia's will.**


	11. Chapter 11

**The Way You Left Me**

**Disclaimer: **_I do not own Criminal Minds or its characters and situations. I am simply a vessel of imagination that uses said property._

**Chapter Eleven**

Emily Prentiss took a deep breath as she walked into the American embassy in Paris. She nodded a hello to people she knew from her childhood through her mother. Calmly, Emily walked into Ambassador Pierre LaBonne's office; she was there for a job interview.

A week after the funeral, Emily received a check in the mail from Garcia's lawyer. Garcia left Emily enough money to move to Paris. One of the last conversations the two friends had was about Emily deciding whether or not to take a job at the embassy as head of security. It wasn't that she did not enjoy working at the BAU; it was just that she knew she would need some change eventually. No one at the embassy had any doubts if Emily could do the job; this was one occupation Emily could get without the help of her mother's name.

As she answered LaBonne's questions in perfect French, Emily thought about the drastic change of scenery. She always loved France and had no issue with living there. The most difficult part of taking the easier job was leaving the one she currently had, but no one on her team had any intention of returning to work at the BAU after they found Garcia's killer. Emily was the second person to hand in her letter of resignation; Morgan was the first.

At the end of the long day of interviews and tours, the ambassador led Emily to her new office that overlooked a park. There were flowers on the windowsill that were every shade of yellow, purple, and pink and covered half the window.

"I apologize for the flowers," the ambassador said. "The last person to have this office did it to add some color to the place."

"The flowers are good," Emily replied with a smile. She took it as a sign of Garcia's approval.

**A/N: The next few chapters were supposed to be all one big chapter, but I split them up.**


	12. Chapter 12

**The Way You Left Me**

**Disclaimer: **_I do not own Criminal Minds or its characters and situations. I am simply a vessel of imagination that uses said property._

**Chapter Twelve**

Aaron and Jack Hotchner ran around their new home just outside of San Francisco, California. The father and son duo just finished unpacking the last box and were chasing each other with water guns in the front yard. After transferring to the FBI office in the city, Aaron had the most time ever to be with his son. He was the newest field director for the region which let him more have a somewhat normal life. There was no more traveling across the nation dealing face-to-face with unsubs.

Aaron will always remember Garcia's generous heart. When he received two checks in the mail, he was speechless. One of the checks was for Jack's college education; even though Jack was not Garcia's godson, she treated him as such.

The other check was enough to help fund the move to California. The decision to take the job as Regional Director was an easy one for Hotchner. The pay was much better, and Jack could use the new location. Their new house was small but it had a large front and back yard. The schools were good and the crime rate was low. Aaron knew it would be a good place to start over.

Garcia's death hit Aaron hard and he knew his life was again changed by an unstable person. He was tired of losing people to psycho killers. Finding Penelope Garcia's killer was the last case for the team. They put their all into locating the person only to discover that the killer was the head of the tech department. Larson McCoy killed Garcia because she was going to replace him after he failed his annual psychological exam and was associated with some questionable behavior. Aaron's anger towards the man only grew stronger when he heard from Morgan that Garcia wasn't going to take the job anyway. It was that last bit of information the officially drove the team away; they lost Garcia because of a jealous coworker. Secretly, they would have dealt better with it being a deranged psychotic that had five personalities instead of a tech geek with an anger problem.

Working at the BAU was too hard to handle after Larson McCoy jumped from the top of the BAU building. Traveling to state after state, finding murderers and rapists, and trying to live a normal life once they were back home became truly impossible. Aaron's team was not the same. He saw the distance between them increase as weeks went by. Letters of resignation landed on his desk as soon as they filed the last of the paperwork. And Aaron couldn't agree more. The moment he received the last letter, from Reid, Aaron signed his own and left his office for the last time.


	13. Chapter 13

**The Way You Left Me**

**Disclaimer: **_I do not own Criminal Minds or its characters and situations. I am simply a vessel of imagination that uses said property._

**Chapter Thirteen**

David Rossi sat on his front porch and watched the sunset. He lived in Vermont now, in a house that once belonged to an old writer friend of his. The money Garcia left him helped a lot with fixing the place up. The fairly large home was full of first edition and rare books; David even found a few in the shed in the backyard. It made sense that the largest room in the house was the library. David was happy here.

He was officially retired once more, but there was no chance of his going back to work at the BAU. Those days of chasing the bad guys were over. As he watched the sun retreat behind the field next to his home, he let his mind wander to a deeper place filled with dead friends and estranged family. The most recent death in his life tipped the scale for him. He was finished with losing; he wanted to gain for once.

Like the other times when he needed to escape, David began writing; yet this time was different. He was the co-writer and was working with someone who had firsthand knowledge about the subject matter. The new business venture would be an interesting one that kept him attached to the real world filled with the evilest people and allowed him to still make a difference.

While the sun painted the last colors of the day, David smiled and let himself believe everything was going to be fine.


	14. Chapter 14

**The Way You Left Me**

**Disclaimer: **_I do not own Criminal Minds or its characters and situations. I am simply a vessel of imagination that uses said property._

**Chapter Fourteen**

Ashley Seaver walked quickly through the streets of New York City, negotiating her way past lost tourists and busy locals. She had been there for a few months now and absolutely loved the fast pace of the city.

She was a graduate student at Columbia University, studying child psychology and child development. Her thesis was on the effects of parental choices on children, mainly the children of serial killers. Ashley spent weeks on her proposal and the end result was a full grant to fund her research and a book deal that let her work with an old friend. She laughed at the way Rossi reacted to her idea because it seemed to revive his spirit.

There were times when she missed the fast pace of working with the BAU, but she knew that she was never really cut out for the job. She wanted to make a difference in the world, and now she was. In her mind, Ashley was stopping the serial killers of the future before they became serial killers. Her plan was to finish her research, go for her doctorate, and start her own practice. She already had enough for a down payment on the building she wanted, thanks to Garcia. Her research grant and any residuals from the book should pay for the rest.

Life in New York was just what Ashley needed to help her cope with the changes in her life. She always had something to do and someone to see. Her phone had all the phone numbers of her BAU team, but she did not call them that much beyond birthdays. Ashley was finally adjusting to a lifestyle; she knew Garcia was proud of her.


	15. Chapter 15

**The Way You Left Me**

**Disclaimer: **_I do not own Criminal Minds or its characters and situations. I am simply a vessel of imagination that uses said property._

**Chapter Fifteen**

Spencer Reid sorted the papers on his desk. He was finished all of his work for the next two weeks. His students knew what they needed to have done by the time he returned, and since his students adored him, Spencer was confident that they wouldn't neglect their assignments.

"Dr. Reid?" someone at his office door asked.

"Yes… oh hello Kelly," Spencer greeted his student. Kelly James was one of his brighter students, always ready to answer a question. She had hopes of joining the BAU someday, so she was a constant fixture in Spencer's office.

"I was wondering if you could look over my paper before you leave," she asked in a small voice.

Spencer held out his hand, and Kelly smiled. Any other student would have waited until he came back, but Kelly knew he had a soft spot for her. He scanned her paper quickly and wrote notes on the back of the last page. After five minutes, Kelly was given her paper. She could never get over how quickly her professor read things.

"Thank you, Dr. Reid," she said as she left his office.

"You're welcome," Spencer called out. Unlike himself, Kelly was very good at the physical aspect of working with the BAU, and with some more academic training, she would be a good addition to any team.

He loved teaching at the FBI Academy. It was where he first met Jason Gideon and where he knew he could make a difference. When he resigned from the BAU, the dean of academics approached him within three days, asking Spencer to be a full-time professor. Two weeks later, Spencer was organizing his office and creating syllabi for his classes.

As he locked his office door, on his way to his car, Spencer noticed the stares from his fellow professors and some of his students. His life story circulated around the academic wing of the academy on his first day of teaching classes three semesters ago. He knew what they were talking about now: his mother. He wanted to tell them that she did not kill herself, that it was a brain aneurysm. But he realized he did not care what they thought in the long run.

Spencer decided to drive from Virginia to Las Vegas. He wanted the time to clear his head. He was happy his mother's death was natural and that the last time he saw her, she was very lucid, almost completely. She knew who he was and talked about current events. She was his mother for once.

The drive itself was not that long. He could have taken his time since his mother was cremated, and all he had to do was sign some papers. Spencer enjoyed the scenery and the calming feeling of being completely free. He didn't want to think of his mother as a burden, but there was a feeling of freedom surrounding him now. What he loved most about his mother's death was that she was not in the institution when she died. He likes to think that she died happy. Spencer used the money Garcia left him to put his mother in a small house with a live-in nurse. At first, his mother hated the idea but then she grew accustomed to it and loved her new way of life.

Dr. Spencer Reid had a new way of life now.


	16. Chapter 16

**The Way You Left Me**

**Disclaimer: **_I do not own Criminal Minds or its characters and situations. I am simply a vessel of imagination that uses said property._

**Chapter Sixteen**

Jennifer Jareau watched as Henry played with his little sister, Olivia. Will was at work at the Chicago police department; he was a lieutenant now. JJ was still on maternity leave after giving birth to Olivia two months ago.

It was a difficult road after Garcia's death. JJ shutdown completely and she knew there was talk of having her committed as a safety precaution. When she found the spousal admission forms in Will's glove compartment, JJ worked hard to get her mind back together. And after a couple of weeks of crying and a promise to see a therapist, she was back to normal, maybe even better.

The last time Will talked about getting JJ some help, it was after the case in Montana. Garcia was there with him, talking him out of it and encouraging him at the same time. She willingly took care of Henry while JJ and Will discussed JJ's mental state. In the end, JJ held it together long enough to convince Will that it was just a phase. Garcia knew better and kept a close eye on her until the day she died. JJ still missed Garcia, especially during birthdays and holidays and when she needed someone to talk to. And JJ would have loved for Olivia to have met her would-be godmother. But she had to carry on for her family's sake. She had no choice.

Will decided to take the job in Chicago because it would force JJ to focus more on her family. The district he worked in was in the wealthier part of the city and did not deal much with violent crimes; it didn't hurt that the pay was better. JJ got a job as a news correspondent for local authorities. Her job was to represent the police departments during press conferences. It wasn't as exciting as working with the BAU but it kept JJ close to home and she was still able to work with the BAU whenever there was a team in the area.

It was during those times when a team was in the area that she became agitated. She worried about Henry when he was at school or at a friend's house. And now she had to worry about Olivia growing up in a world that wasn't always so nice. But JJ held on to the idea that if needed, she could protect her family, even if she could not protect her closest friend.

But JJ believed that Garcia was working from the grave. Henry's college tuition was paid for and she and Will had enough money to do extra things as a family. While no amount of money could make up for losing Garcia, JJ was happy to know that even in death, her best friend was there for her in some way.


	17. Chapter 17

**The Way You Left Me**

**Disclaimer: **_I do not own Criminal Minds or its characters and situations. I am simply a vessel of imagination that uses said property._

**A/N: Graduate school is taking me over. The next chapter is the reunion chapter and will be the last chapter.**

**Chapter Seventeen**

Derek Morgan laughed. For the first time in five years, Derek Morgan laughed as he watched his new family draw plans for a tree house. They argued about color and size for thirty minutes, only for them to come up with pictures of airplanes and pirate ships.

"What happened to the tree house plans?" Derek asked them when they handed him their pictures.

"We decided that you should just surprise us," said Joshua. He was the oldest out of the three children and probably convinced the other two to go along with him.

"Is that right?" Derek asked the two little ones running around his legs.

"Yeah, that is right," replied Grace, the middle child. Nathan just nodded his head in response.

"Okay… well what will the three of you do while I make this tree house happen?" Derek watched as three mischievous smiles appeared on his children's faces.

"It's a surprise," Joshua said, taking the hands of the other two and walking towards the house. Once they were safely inside, Derek got to work on the tree house. The largest and only tree in their backyard didn't really belong there, but it was strong and would hold a tree house built for three children. It was still early in the day, so he could have half of it done by dinnertime.

He started cutting thick pieces of wood and thought about what he went through to wind up doing this task. It wasn't the easiest road but it Derek believed it was meant for him.

After resigning from the BAU, Derek packed his bags and left. The last thing he did, at the request of Penelope's lawyer, was leave an address where she could send whatever his fiancée left him in her will. Derek had everything sent to his mother's house in Chicago. He didn't find out what it was until three years later, when he finally visited his mother on her birthday after missing a couple of years.

His first thought was to give all the money away to charity and keep living his life as a wandering soul, but his mother convinced him to wait. When he left her house after a few months, he set off for Arizona just because he could.

It was just supposed to be him and his truck driving around the country and maybe going international, but that changed when he saw them walking along the side of the road. Seeing the three small children slowly making their way up the highway, Derek went into protective mode and pulled up alongside them.

"Hey you three, get in," Derek said. He opened the passenger side door, but the children stepped back.

"No thank you, sir," said the tallest boy. He wore a t-shirt and shorts, and like the other two, he had on flip flops that were worn down. The little girl and boy holding his hand didn't look up at Derek and fidgeted with their hair.

"Look, I'm not going to hurt you," Derek said in a clam voice. He noted the unbelieving look on the boy's face. Derek reached into his glove compartment and pulled out his FBI identification. Officially, he was still an agent. He gave it to the little boy and watched as his face concentrated on the picture.

"Go ahead," the boy said as he helped the younger ones into the car. "I will keep this… for safety reasons."

"Okay," Derek replied with a smile. Already he was thinking of how to get these children back home, but deep down he knew they had no home to speak of.

For Derek, that day was the beginning of the rest of his life. After doing some searching around, he found out all the information he needed. The three children were named Joshua, Grace, and Nathan; they had no last name. Their parents killed themselves with poison and left the three to support themselves. After a bad stay at a foster home, Nathan took his younger siblings away and they were walking around the area ever since, sleeping in abandoned homes. From the moment they got into his truck, Derek knew he would not stop taking care of them.

That was two years ago. Now, Derek Morgan was the proud father of a ten year old boy, an eight year old girl, and a six year old boy. Derek was happy. His children brought the joy back into his life. Slowly, the four of them healed together and made the best out of what they had.

Derek still wore his engagement ring. He didn't date, but he was finally content with his life. When Grace asked about his ring, he told her and her brothers that he lost his wife in a workplace accident. Now, when asked, the Morgan children always say that they lost their mother unexpectedly. Derek loved his children for the simple fact that they wanted to have normal lives. They didn't speak about their biological parents but they were not affected much by their absence. Countless child therapists asked them about what their lives were like but no one could find something out of the ordinary besides the suicide. Derek decided to move to Arizona. He used some the money Penelope left him to buy a house and car. The rest of the money went towards other expenses and future college educations.

It was getting close to lunchtime when his children approached him. They were carrying a large poster board.

"Okay, Daddy, are you ready for your surprise?" Grace asked him.

"Sure, little lady," Derek said as they handed him the poster board.

Amongst the flowers and airplanes, there was a carefully written phrase: **You are the best father ever**. With tears in his eyes and a smile on his face, Derek pulled his children in for a hug. They were a makeshift family, but they were family. Plus, it didn't hurt that in some odd way, Joshua, Grace, and Nathan looked like they could be Derek and Penelope's children.

In a few weeks, it would be the fifth year anniversary of Penelope's death and they would travel to Virginia to visit her gravesite. But at that moment, Derek honestly believed that they would always have her love surrounding them.


	18. Chapter 18

**The Way You Left Me**

**Disclaimer: **_I do not own Criminal Minds or its characters and situations. I am simply a vessel of imagination that uses said property._

**A/N: Thank you everyone for reading this story. This is my first complete fanfiction. I have a few more ideas for more stories, but I probably won't post anything until after I finish classes later this month.**

**Well, here is the reunion chapter.**

**Chapter Eighteen**

Spencer Reid looked nervous as he drove to BAU headquarters. His wife, Amelia, had to reach over and hold his hand to make sure he drove straight. They met ten years ago at a criminal justice conference and have been inseparable since. Amelia knew how important this day was for Spencer and his closest friends.

"I haven't been in this building in years, Amelia," Spencer said as they pulled into the parking lot.

"Technically, you have never been inside this particular building," Amelia replied. And she was right. The reason they were in Virginia was because they were invited to the unveiling of the new BAU headquarters. Spencer took a couple of deep breaths and debated whether or not to get out of the car. Just as he was going to start the car and drive off, Amelia opened the door and got out. Spencer smiled at her graciously, got out of the car, and locked the door.

However, the couple didn't leave the parking lot. Spencer wanted to wait and see who else would show up for the event, even though he knew everyone from his old team and their spouses would be there. He thought of the last time he saw any of them at the same time, which was during the Christmas season a few years ago when Emily arranged for everyone to come to Paris for her wedding. Deep in his thoughts, Spencer failed to notice his wife waving to someone standing a few cars away. Looking up to see Jennifer Jareau, Spencer let out a heavy sigh and smiled.

"JJ, hello," Amelia greeted as she walked over to her friend. The two women hugged each other.

"Where are Isaac and Nicola?" JJ asked, looking back at Spencer's car for signs of the seven year old Reid twins.

"They are at the Smithsonian with an old friend of mine," Amelia said. "Spencer and I thought it would be best if they didn't come today."

"Yeah, Will and I decided to let Henry look after Olivia until Will and I return."

"How are the college man and the little lady?" Spencer asked when he reached the two women.

"They are doing well," JJ said as she hugged the godfather of her children. Will walked up and kissed Amelia on the cheek and hugged Spencer also.

"It is weird being back here isn't it?" JJ asked Spencer who was holding Amelia's hand. It was a nice spring day and the new building glittered in the sunlight; it looked so foreign to him.

"Yeah, it is very weird," Spencer answered. "I didn't think I would be back here at all." Even when he was teaching at the academy, Spencer refused to go to the BAU building.

JJ and Spencer talked awhile before the rest of their old team showed up. Aaron Hotchner and his wife of twelve years, Francis, parked not too far away. JJ and Spencer waved to them once they got out of the car. Then Emily Prentiss arrived with her husband Leon Garriere. David Rossi, the perpetual bachelor, pulled up along one side of Spencer's car and Ashley Seaver and her husband, Jonathan Mills, pulled up on the other side. The rest of the team watched with amused expressions as both David and Jonathan held on to a noticeably pregnant Ashley. Last but not least, Derek Morgan arrived in his truck; he didn't wear his ring anymore, but he was still single.

They shared hugs in the parking lot and caught up with each other. Ashley was expecting a boy and Emily had a thirteen year old stepdaughter and a ten year old son, both wanted to live in the United States. The Morgan children were doing very well in school: Joshua was at UCLA, Grace was at Howard University, and Nathan was thinking about NYU. Jack Hotchner was at Stanford University and thinking about law school. Henry LaMontagne was at Yale and looking at biology while his sister Olivia had her heart set on painting. Being the children of two very intelligent people Spencer's twins were doing great in school. After a good thirty minutes, the old friends walked towards the building.

The unveiling ceremony was touching. The speakers talked about the changes made within the agency and what that means for the rest of the nation. Former agents shared stories and new agents expressed their appreciation. After about three hours of talking with old acquaintances, Aaron Hotchner's old team walked to where their old offices were. Everything looked the same for the most part, except for newer equipment. No one looked at where Penelope Garcia's office was until they heard Derek Morgan give a small chuckle.

The office was now an impromptu art gallery of sorts. The floor was covered in different types of art supplies and the walls and floor were covered in paint. The sign above the office read: **Let it all out, holding it in gets hard after a while**.

Each member of the team picked up a paint chisel and carved their initials into the wall, along with the initials of their children and spouses. When they were all finished, some of them wipe away tears while others remained silent. The office still felt like Garcia.

There would be other times to meet with each other, especially with graduations approaching. But they knew this moment was an official goodbye to the life they shared together.

Aaron Hotchner was retired and living in California with his wife Francis.

Emily Prentiss, now Emily Garriere, was still living in Paris and working with local police as a translator.

JJ was a correspondent with CNN and living in New York City with her family; Will was head of the police academy in Brooklyn.

Spencer Reid was head of the history department at Princeton; Amelia was head of the English department.

Ashley Seaver, now Ashley Mills, was one of the nation's leading child psychologists and next in line to head the psychology department at Columbia University.

Derek Morgan was captain of the Harrington, Arizona police department.

They had all coped well from Penelope Garcia's death. Sometimes they wished she was there to share a milestone in their lives, but at the same time they were accepting of her death. Each of them knew that had she not died, their lives wouldn't be the same.

So as they walked out of the new BAU building and headed to their cars, they gave a silent farewell to Penelope Garcia and went home.


End file.
